18 The Lord is near to the brokenhearted
and saves the crushed in spirit.
In our house, in our home, God is present and made His presence known in a big way while Keith made his long transition home. The God I felt during that time is the God I seek today with the knowledge that I too, saw His work, His grace, and His love. While I’ve never doubted His leaving my side, it is only through Him that I find the strength to endure the loneliness. He has kept me from dying a spiritual death and gives me the strength to carry on. I must say Amen for His promises.
I don’t expect everyone to have the same faith that I do but I hope that God, however He manifests himself to people, that they feel something bigger than themselves. If we allow for this in our lives, the doors of life and opportunity are everywhere we look. If we wake every day with the thought that today I promise something good for myself, the heavy weight of disappointment in our lives (whether from illness or accident or mean-spirited people) can be managed and logically put in a place where it needs to be, and not a constant gnawing at us that will eat away every energy cell that we have. I have allowed that to happen to me from time to time but find that if I listen, if I truly listen to my heart where my God lives, I can manage and enjoy the good things in life. Like family. Like friends. Like nature. Something good for myself is waking up and saying “Thank you for another day”. It’s appreciation of one’s self and appreciation of others that I believe make us stronger human beings.
My vacation in Florida was wonderful. To come face to face with people who I have interacted with for 4-1/2 years through cyber space was and always will be a highlight of my life. You would not imagine that internet friendship could be built with the same intensity that in-person friendships create. What is beautiful about these friendships is that there are never any expectations from each other. We just are. We just love each other as if we are family. We totally get each other. Some are patients, some are caregivers and somehow we overlap each other so well that cancer (even through tragedy) takes a back seat when it comes to being together. One of my favorite quotes is:
“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What? You, too?” I thought I was the only one.”
I wish I could see myself ten years from now. It seems I need to continue to grab those energy cells one by one still and live in the moment and today, I am very happy to do that. I want to make measurable (to me) strides that are significant in the hopes that by doing this, I can help others to do that too.
Next week one of my goals will come full circle and I can’t wait to share it with you!